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History of Canada's Chinese Community
Adventures in China
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November 19 On Beating ChildrenNovember 20th marks Universal Children's Day. I always thought it was June 1st, but I looked it up and found that June 1st is International Children's Day. What's the difference? I haven't been able to find a solid answer.
Anyways, in honour of Universal Children's Day, I wanted to address the issue of beating children. In my travels around the world I have found that most places and cultures, in North and South America, Africa, Asia, and Europe, believe that it is both necessary and healthy to beat children. The belief is that children are born bad and this proclivity towards evil can be corrected through the act of spanking or beating. I'm not sure how people came to believe this. But in reading older literature I have found that people used to believe that those who behaved badly were possessed by evil demons. And by beating people, the demons would be exorcized and scared away.
I remember back in 1986, I was walking along at the Expo in Vancouver. I saw a man beating a child (perhaps it was his own; I couldn't be sure). There were security guards nearby, but, though they obviously saw it, they did nothing. I walked along to another zone of the grounds and, this time, I saw two adults engaged in a fist fight. Security guards came running from all over to break it up. I gathered from this that if two equally-matched opponents are punishing one another, this must be stopped. But if one much larger and stronger person is beating a small one, who is too young to defend himself, it is acceptable. Is it just me or is something wrong here?
Nowadays more and more people who are of the reasoning kind (rather than the ignorant who blindly follow tradition) are questioning the whole phenomenon of beating children. They are coming to realize that beating children doesn't make the children good; it makes them more bad. And this creates a vicious cycle. A child behaves badly, the parent beats him causing him to behave more badly, triggering the parent to beat him more.
We are on the brink of decadence if we fail to come to terms with this. What is the truth? Is beating children a good thing? Does it make them better people? Or does it make them all the worse? The one the media called "The Peace Prophet", after a lifetime of Persian and Ottoman prison and exile with his dad for espousing beliefs that upset the authorities of the time, beliefs which we take for granted today, traveled to Europe, then to the United States and Canada back in 1911-12. He said the following on this issue:
"Whensoever a mother seeth that her child hath done well, let her praise and applaud him and cheer his heart; and if the slightest undesirable trait should manifest itself, let her counsel the child and punish him, and use means based on reason, even a slight verbal chastisement should this be necessary. It is not, however, permissible to strike a child, or vilify him, for the child's character will be totally perverted if he be subjected to blows or verbal abuse."
—Abdu'l-Bahá (1844-1921)
From hubpages.com:
10 Reasons to Never Strike a Child
1. The risk of child abuse increases with physical punishment. Hitting too hard can cause severe injuries such as broken bones, bruises, welts, and nerve damage.
2. Physical punishment encourages an erosion of trust between child and parent.
3. Regular physical punishment is shown to worsen, not improve behavior. It often leads to an increase in antisocial behavior such as cheating, lying, assaulting, stealing, bullying siblings or peers, and a lack of remorse for any wrongdoing.
4. Hitting children teaches a pro-violence attitude. It transmits to children that striking people who are weaker and smaller is permissible.
5. Fear is not an effective method of teaching acceptable behavior. Fear can lead kids to obey only when the person who strikes them is close by.
6. Childhood memories of resentment and anger linger in adults who were frequently hit as kids.
7. Often, people hit children for behavior that does not need correcting, but is instead related to basic needs for food, sleep, attention, and exploring.
8. When hitting a child, the caretaker loses an important opportunity to correct the misbehavior and teach a more appropriate behavior.
9. Although striking a child may end a misbehavior for the moment, other methods such as reasoning, time out, time in, talking, and implementing non-violent consequences work even better and do not have the potential for harm that exists with hitting.
10. Better alternatives work! Children learn best through discussing, teaching, and observing adults who model caring, responsible, and self-disciplined behavior.
________
One last note. These days those of us especially in the western world have become obsessed with the whole notion of qualifications. People are not allowed to do something or become something unless they are "qualified". Becoming qualified often means passing some particular set of exams that often cover material unrelated to the subject. And then, if they obtain a certain score, they are awarded with certificates. They have to pay a lot of money in order to write the exams and get the certificates. And sometimes, they have to pay a fee every year to keep their qualification status. Sometimes they are given particular letters that they are supposed to put before of after their surname to announce to everyone that they are qualified to do or be something. With all the trendy fanaticism over this in recent years, here is a question:
What qualifications must a person obtain in order to be allowed to become a parent? November 18 Gigi in ShaanxiHere's an interesting question: What is the most valuable treasure a community can possess? Precious metals? Gems? A mammoth shopping mall? A zero crime rate? A park? A hospital?
While all of these, to varying degrees, may be seen as valuable, the most valuable treasure is none of the above. In my opinion, the most valuable treasure a community can possess is children. Without them, a community is living simply to die. It is stagnant and has no purpose.
But these days, with cancerous materialism having infected most of humanity, with the self being placed on the altar, with pleasure and diversion being seen as the most important features of life, increasingly, children are being seen not as a treasure but a burden to society.
People are marrying later and later in life. And many people do not regard the procreation of children as the primary purpose of marriage. Many who marry don't want to have children or want as few as possible. They use every excuse imaginable: it's too expensive to raise a child; I don't have time to raise a child; it would mean sacrificing my lovely career; it's too big a responsibility / hassle.
Rather than spending double incomes on the needs of their children, many prefer to lavish their own lives with extravagance, buying themselves huge homes, fancy sports cars, the latest electronic gadgets, world cruises, what have you.
There are also a number of people who have children simply because they believe in the tradition, but abuse them or neglect them. They think paternalistically, that they needn't teach them anything—no morals, no manners, not how to deal with making a life for themselves in a decadent society—but simply buy them things, lots of things, and provide for them.
As an ESL teacher, I know that most ESL teachers don't want to teach children; no one does. They think it's too much hassle. Classroom teachers of children don't earn much of a living, so why bother, many say and become oil tycoons.
Well, after saying all this, here is a noble thing…
In the summer, Chinese celebrities Gigi Leung, Valen Xu, Charlie, and Angelica Li lent a hand to four representatives of the HOPE Charitable Education Fund by attending a Book Fair called "Summer Bookworm". Gigi wrote a book of stories for children entitled, "Little Flower of the Fantasy World". She personally traveled from Hong Kong to the much poorer Shaanxi Province in Mainland China to hand-deliver the books to children at various schools.
What was really sweet was that, according to her, the children were very orderly, taking the book one at a time, and not opening them until they got approval from their teachers. She also said that one of the principals asked her, "May I have one?" And she commented that happiness can come from simple things. Children in Hong Kong spend a thousand bucks to get a video game console. But here, with her simple gift of a children's book, the kids were much happier.
Well done!
 See the following link for more photos:
November 05 November 2009 UpdateCarolyn and I have found a new apartment. It's in a good spot in Pudong, close to the subway, closer to my work and to Carolyn's parents' place. It's bigger (113 square metres) and cheaper than our current pad and has two balconies. I told Carolyn we're going to have to buy a barbecue. But she's more into getting a flat-screen TV.
Work is going better now. They gave me a bonus. They're realizing that getting good foreign teachers isn't an easy task, so treating those well who teach well is a must. The least sign of contempt by employers to their employees is usually an act of corporate suicide. But most places don't realize this. The fact that I'm getting paid well for teaching only 13-14 hours a week is pretty good. And now that we're moving I won't have to spend 3 hours on the subway everyday wrestling with kung fu masters for a seat.
Now that our move is official, we're busy packing everyday. Let's hope some ticks and roaches don't sneak inside any of the boxes to infest our new home.
What else is official is that they've just agreed to build the world's biggest Disneyland in Pudong. So, we'll be able to hang out with Mickey everyday, eh. October 31 Chinese Number Ones - Part 2/2As promised, here is the list of Chinese Number One songs from December 2005 up to October 2009. There are 75 songs in total. Please note that, normally, the songs went number one a week or so before the date given. The date refers to the time the song was listed as topping the charts. Also note that some weeks were absent from the database so the song wasn't necessarily number one from date to date. There may have been another Number One song in-between two consecutive dates. Take the English translations with a grain of salt. I used a translator that may not be entirely reliable.
Format:
Date Song-Title-in-Chinese (Song-Title-English-Translation) by Artist-English-Name (Artist-Chinese-Name)
2005-12-1 夜曲 (Nocturne) by Jay Zhou (周杰伦)
2005-12-15 不想长大 (Don't Want to Grow Up) by S.H.E.
2006-1-5 让爱靠近 (Spread Love Around) by Jolin Cai (蔡依林)
2006-1-19 冬天快乐 (Happy Winter) by Chris Li (李宇春)
2006-1-26 霍元甲 (Fearless) by Jay Zhou (周杰伦)
2006-2-23 曹操 (Cao Cao) by JJ Lin (林俊杰)
2006-3-23 原来 (Original) by JJ Lin (林俊杰)
2006-3-30 Give Me Five by Chris Li (李宇春)
2006-4-6 天鹅 (Swan) by Bibi Zhou (周笔畅)
2006-4-20 你一定要幸福 (You Must Be Happy) by He Jie (何洁)
2006-5-11 唱得响亮 (Sing Loudly) by Angela An (安又琪)
2006-5-18 舞娘 (Dancing Diva) by Jolin Cai (蔡依林)
2006-6-22 只剩我一个 (I'm Left with Only One) by Bibi Zhou (周笔畅)
2006-6-29 认真的雪 (Serious Snow) by Jacky Xue (薛之谦)
2006-8-3 飞行部落 (Flight Tribe) by F.I.R.
2006-8-17 太美丽 (Too Beautiful) by David Tao (陶喆)
2006-8-24 号码 (Number) by Bibi Zhou (周笔畅)
2006-8-31 千里之外 (Thousands of Miles Away) by Jay Zhou (周杰伦)
2006-10-26 亲亲 (Kiss) by Fish Liang (梁静茹)
2006-11-30 放开 (Release) by Loving (爱乐团)
2006-12-14 黄金甲 (Golden Flower) by Jay Zhou (周杰伦)
2007-1-18 梦里花 (Dream in a Flower) by Angela Zhang (张韶涵)
2007-3-1 爱情转移 (Love Transfer) by Eason Chan (陈奕迅)
2007-4-12 逆光 (Backlight) by Stefanie Sun (孙燕姿)
2007-4-19 发现爱 (Find Love) by JJ Lin & Kym (林俊杰 金莎)
2007-5-10 中国话 (Chinese) by S.H.E.
2007-6-7 说你爱我 (Say You Love Me) by S.H.E.
2007-6-28 杀手 (Killer) by JJ Lin (林俊杰)
2007-7-5 不能说的秘密 (Can't Reveal the Secret) by Jay Zhou (周杰伦)
2007-8-23 G大调的悲伤 (Grief in G-Flat Major) by Jane Zhang (张靓颖)
2007-8-30 如果你也听说 (If You've Heard) by Sherry Zhang (张惠妹)
2007-9-20 玩酷 (Play it Cool) by Wilber Pan (潘玮柏)
2007-10-11 日不落 (Unsetting Sun) by Jolin Cai (蔡依林)
2007-10-18 牛仔很忙 (Busy Cowboy) by Jay Zhou (周杰伦)
2007-11-1 彩虹 (Rainbow Restaurant) by Jay Zhou (周杰伦)
2007-12-6 青花瓷 (Blue and White Porcelain) by Jay Zhou (周杰伦)
2007-12-13 会呼吸的痛 (Pain Will Be Breathing) by Fish Liang (梁静茹)
2007-12-27 投名状 (Warlords) by Andy Lau (刘德华)
2008-1-10 我很好 (I'm Fine) by Rene Liu (刘若英)
2008-1-31 周大侠 (Zhou Heroes) by Jay Zhou (周杰伦)
2008-2-28 我可以 (I Can) by Sam Li (李圣杰)
2008-3-6 依然在一起 (Still Together) by Ma Tian Yu (马天宇)
2008-3-27 为你写诗 (Writing Poetry for You) by Kenji Wu (吴克群)
2008-4-17 越爱越难过 (The More Love, the Sadder) by Kenji Wu (吴克群)
2008-4-24 千山万水 (Numerous Mountains and Rivers) by Jay Zhou (周杰伦)
2008-5-15 舍不得 (Reluctant) by Xian Zi (弦子)
2008-5-29 北京欢迎你 (Beijing Welcomes You) by Various Artists (群星)
2008-7-10 一颗心的距离 (A Distance from the Heart) by Christine Fan (范玮琪)
2008-7-24 风云决 (Storm Rider) by Richie Jen (任贤齐)
2008-8-11 满满的都是爱 (Packed Full of Love) by Fish Liang (梁静茹)
2008-8-21 我和你 (You and Me) by Liu Huan & Sarah Brightman (刘欢 莎拉布莱曼)
2008-9-18 画心 (Art Heart) by Jane Zhang (张靓颖)
2008-10-9 稻香 (Rice Paddy) by Jay Zhou (周杰伦)
2008-11-6 说好的幸福呢 (Say Yes to Happiness) by Jay Zhou (周杰伦)
2008-12-4 深深爱过你 (Love You Deeply) by Jacky Xue (薛之谦)
2008-12-11 属于 (Belong) by Fish Liang (梁静茹)
2008-12-25 花开的声音 (Voices Bloom) by Jane Zhang (张靓颖)
2009-1-15 孤单摩天轮 (Lonely Ferris Wheel) by Fahrenheit (飞轮海)
2009-2-19 爱得起 (Give Love) by Gigi Leung (梁咏琪)
2009-2-26 表达爱 (Expression of Love) by JJ Lin & Liao Zhong (林俊杰 廖君)
2009-3-19 大丈夫 (Big Man) by Jolin Cai (蔡依林)
2009-4-16 妥协 (Compromise) by Jolin Cai (蔡依林)
2009-4-23 关不上的窗 (Don't Shut the Window) by Steve Zhou (周传雄)
2009-5-7 勇敢 (Brave) by BY2
2009-6-4 双人舞 (Pas de Deux) by Wilber Pan (潘玮柏)
2009-6-11 残缺的歌 (Incomplete Song) by Wang Xiao Kun (王啸坤)
2009-6-25 沉默的瞬间 (Moment of Silence) by Nicholas Teo (张栋梁)
2009-7-2 蜀绣 (Shu Embroidery) by Chris Li (李宇春)
2009-7-23 与爱情无关 (Love Has Nothing To Do with It) by Chris Yu (游鸿明)
2009-8-6 灰色的彩虹 (Grey Rainbow) by Christine Fan (范玮琪)
2009-8-13 非常完美 (Perfect) by Angela Zhang (张韶涵)
2009-9-3 我要的飞翔 (I Want to Fly) by Xu Fei (许飞)
2009-9-17 梦田 (Field of Dreams) by S.H.E.
2009-9-24 白白的 (White) by Angela Zhang (张韶涵)
2009-10-9 闪闪惹人爱 (Sparkles Arouse Love) by Elva Xiao (萧亚轩) October 25 Chinese Number Ones - Part 1/2Over the past few years, Baidu has been keeping track of the weekly Top 10 Chinese songs. Rather than provide an extensive list of all these, I'm just going to look at the Number One songs. The charts began 1 December 2005 and have been running weekly (with the odd omission) up to the present time.
During these nearly four years (175 weeks listed) 75 songs from some 40 Chinese artists have topped the charts. If we look at the number of weeks a particular artist has topped the charts, Jay Zhou (周杰伦) takes the cake at 37 weeks. Coming in second is Jolin Cai (蔡依林) at 13 weeks. Singapore's JJ Lin (林俊杰) spent 7 weeks as a soloist. If we include his two duets that reached Number One, his total is 12 weeks. S.H.E. spent 11 weeks on top of the charts and Malaysia's Fish Liang spent 10 weeks at Number One.
Artists with the most Number One songs were Jay Zhou with 12; Jolin Cai and JJ Lin (including his two duets) with 5 apiece; Fish Liang and S.H.E. with 4 apiece.
In terms of trivia, there was one foreign artist who topped the charts in a duet with a Chinese: Sarah Brightman. There was a song sung by many Chinese singers together: "Beijing Welcomes You". And, as I mentioned, there were a couple of duets involving JJ Lin: one with Kym and one with Liao Zhong.
Below is a summary. Bolded artists are those with more than 5 weeks on the charts and/or at least 3 No. 1 hits.
1 December 2005 – 9 October 2009 Artist's English Name (Chinese Name), Weeks at No. 1, No. 1 Hits:
Andy Lau (刘德华), 2, 1 Angela An (安又琪), 1, 1 Angela Zhang (张韶涵), 8, 3 Bibi Zhou (周笔畅), 4, 3 BY2, 2, 1 Chris Li (李宇春), 5, 3 Chris Yu (游鸿明), 2, 1 Christine Fan (范玮琪), 3, 2 David Tao (陶喆), 1, 1 Eason Chan (陈奕迅), 6, 1 Elva Xiao (萧亚轩), 1, 1 F.I.R., 2, 1 Fahrenheit (飞轮海), 3, 1 Fish Liang (梁静茹), 10, 4 Gigi Leung (梁咏琪), 1, 1 He Jie (何洁), 2, 1 Jacky Xue (薛之谦), 6, 2 Jane Zhang (张靓颖), 4, 3 Jay Zhou (周杰伦), 37, 12 JJ Lin (林俊杰), 7, 3 JJ Lin & Kym (林俊杰 金莎), 2, 1 JJ Lin & Liao Zhong (林俊杰 廖君), 3, 1 Jolin Cai (蔡依林), 13, 5 Kenji Wu (吴克群), 4, 2 Liu Huan (刘欢) & Sarah Brightman, 4, 1 Loving (爱乐团), 2, 1 Ma Tian Yu (马天宇), 3, 1 Nicholas Teo (张栋梁), 1, 1 Rene Liu (刘若英), 3, 1 Richie Jen (任贤齐), 2, 1 S.H.E., 11, 4 Sam Li (李圣杰), 1, 1 Sherry Zhang (张惠妹), 4, 1 Stefanie Sun (孙燕姿), 1, 1 Steve Zhou (周传雄), 2, 1 Various Artists (群星), 5, 1 Wang Xiao Kun (王啸坤), 1, 1 Wilber Pan (潘玮柏), 4, 2 Xian Zi (弦子), 1, 1 Xu Fei (许飞), 1, 1
Next I'll provide a list of all the Number One songs.
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How To - and how NOT to - Treat Each Other
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